


The Dead Lab

by randomclustermissile



Category: Doctor Who (2005), Portal (Video Game)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-29
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2018-12-08 10:47:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11644998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randomclustermissile/pseuds/randomclustermissile
Summary: Clara and Eleven are off on a science-oriented adventure. But what happens when the TARDIS malfunctions and the duo wake up in Aperture Labs?





	1. Chapter 1

The TARDIS door creaked as Clara Oswald strolled in, a big smile on her face.

“So, Doctor,” She beamed, placing both hands onto the central panel of the vast interior of the time machine. “Where to next? What magical adventure do you wish to take me on next?”

The doctor twiddled his thumbs and frowned. “I don't know. You decide. What magical place do you wish to go?”

Clara blinked and turned her head to look at him. “Oh! Um... alright... I guess...” She paused. “Do you know what?”

“I know a lot of things, Clara Oswald. Enlighten me anyway.”

“I say, forget the magic for today. Let's 'ave it your way.” She smirked, the missing 'h' playing on her glossed lips. “Let's go somewhere... sciency. Not catastrophic or evil, just... sciency.”

“Alright then.” The Doctor shrugged. “Pick a science, any science.”

“Is this a magic trick?”

“No it's a science trick. There's a difference.” The Doctor pouted.

“Like, any science?”

“One of the general three would be appreciated.” The Doctor said, his eyes on his collection of bow ties. He picked out a pale blue one. It seemed right for the occasion.

“Alright then. Biology.” Clara stared at the ceiling of the TARDIS.

“No. Not biology. I don't like biology. It's all yucky and gooey and boring.” The Doctor twiddled his fingers in mid-air and made a face. “Try again.”

“Okay then...” Clara stared oddly at him. “Chemistry.” She threw up one hand in the air to show her indifference.

“No that's too specific... It's too 'nitty-gritty' and horrible to explain. You wouldn't understand any of the interesting stuff and you'd end up falling asleep.” The Doctor looked at her. “People who are sleeping don't make good conversation.”

“So I've heard.” Clara nodded in agreement. “That leaves physics.”

“PHYSICS!” The Doctor clicked his finger and pointed at her. “Physics, physics, physics, physics. It's brilliant! Now why didn't you just say that in the first place?”  
Clara rolled her eyes and started pacing around the TARDIS' impossible space.

“What aspect of physics in particular?” The Doctor smiled and rubbed his hands gleefully, the inner workings of his mind beginning to spin. Clara could practically hear the grind of the gears.

“I dunno, gravity?” Clara frowned.

“Gravity! Yes!” The Doctor's eyes lit up, then, just as quickly, sank back down again. He frowned. “Anything else?”

“Light? Manipulation of light?” Clara shook her head. “Where are you going with this?”

“HAVEN'T A CLUE!” The Doctor suddenly shouted, taking Clara by surprise. “Let's go somewhere sciency!” He punched in some numbers and pulled the lever. The mighty TARDIS began to whirr and move. Once Clara had recovered from her slight shock, she smiled and started laughing along with the eccentric and elusive Doctor. Suddenly, the TARDIS' alarm started beeping and the moving stopped.

“Why have we stopped?” Clara asked, picking herself up. “Doctor?” Her voice was toned with worry and confusion.

“What's wrong old girl?” The Doctor whispered, looking up at the TARDIS, ignoring Clara's question. “What's going on?”

“Doctor?”

The TARDIS suddenly went red and thrashing around wildly. The Doctor was thrown out of the now open TARDIS doors, Clara right behind him. She landed on top of him and blacked out.

*

Clara blinked. She blinked again. And again. Her eyelashes had gotten into her eye again. “Blast.” She whispered. She tried to reach her hand up to remove it, but it bumped against glass instead. She was inside a pod with a glass lid. She couldn't move. She started to scream. “LET ME OUT!”  
As if it were listening, the lid opened. The Doctor was in an identical pod next to her. It too, opened, and the Doctor sat up, looking across at her. His face was filled with something Clara didn't often see. Fear. Worry. Confusion. Clara couldn't quite make out what exactly the Doctor was feeling with that odd expression on his face.

”You've got something in your eye.” He said slowly, his expression not changing. He got out of the small pod. He was wearing an orange jumpsuit and strange boots with bits of flexible and malleable metal running down his leg and near his otherwise bare foot.

Clara shook her head, regaining her senses. Her left eye stung, and she managed to remove the pesky eyelash. “Doctor...?” She looked around. “Where are we?” She too, was wearing an orange jumpsuit and those weird boots.

“We're inside some sort of glass box.”

“Yes I can see that, but where are we?”

A radio, sitting on a bench below them, was playing an annoyingly repetitive yet funky tune. A toilet sat next to it.

“Why would there be a toilet her if we were trapped in those pods? It seems illogical.” Clara asked.

“Illogical... yes...” The Doctor didn't seem to be paying her any attention. Instead, he was looking around, outside the glass box. There was a clock on the wall to his left, counting down from 60. There was a camera, tracking his movement, and a window on the white walls to his right, on Clara's side.

“Where are we?” Clara asked him again, looking right at him.

“Well you asked for science, and I think you got it.” The Doctor mumbled.

“What?” She pushed her hair out of her face. “What are you on about?”

“We're in a lab.”

“Hello.” A voice suddenly said, making Clara and the Doctor jump. It was feminine, but vaguely robotic, and any emotion in its tone seemed to be simulated, ingenuine. “Welcome to the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Centre. We hoped your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one. Your specimens have been processed, and we are now ready to begin the test proper. Before we start, however, keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of all Enrichment Centre activities, serious injuries may occur.”

“What is this?” Clara whispered to the Doctor. It was unsure where exactly the voice was coming from. The Doctor shushed her.

“For your own safety,” the voice continued, “and the safety of others, please refrain from-” The voice went staticy and cut out. It seemed to glitch out, speeding up and slowing down, it was hard to make out the words. “-and back. The portal will open in...”

“Doctor what is happening?” Clara shrieked.

3...”

“Doctor where are we?”

“2...”

“DOCTOR!”

“1...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *cue Doctor Who theme*


	2. The First Testchambers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to the Aperture Science Computer Aided Enrichment Centre. These testchambers are designed to test your logic and problem-solving skills. Always remember that fun and learning are the primary goals of the tests.

“Look in the window, Clara.”

“What about it?”

“Well it seems to be some sort of observation room.”

“Yeah, so?”

“Well if the room is for observing the test subjects, i.e. us, where are the observers?”

“Well there are cameras on the wall, so maybe they stopped needing them.”

“Maybe, Clara, but I think the answer is far more sinister.”  
Automatic doors opened in front of them, leading them into the first testchamber. A large button sat in the middle of the room, with a light indicator connected to a door on the far wall. In the corner a large vaccuum chute opened up and a massive cube fell down on the ground with a sharp clatter.

“Well, this is simple.” Clara said, walking over to the cube. “You just pick up the cube, and-” Clara struggled to pick up the massive cube but managed, carried it over to the large button and let it drop. “Drop it on the button.”

'Click!' The door opened and lead the pair to the elevator. The whole time the strange voice remained deadly silent.

“Interesting.” The Doctor mumbled as the elevator started to move.

“What is?”

“We're going up.”

The elevator stopped. There was a slight hesitation before the doors opened.

“So this... woman... robot... thing...' Clara mumbled. “Who is she? And why is she testing us and our intelligence? What does she need us for?”

“I haven't a clue. Right now all we need to focus on is getting out of there. These puzzles may seem easy now, but they'll must likely get harder as we go on.”

The Doctor walked around a corner and approached a small cliff. He held up a hand to stop Clara before she fell. “These boots.” The Doctor said, balancing on one foot and examining the long piece of metal on the other. “They must absorb the force taken from falling long distances.”

“Only one way to find out!” Clara cheered as she jumped down. “Didn't feel a thing, Doctor!”

The Doctor shook his head and sighed, but said nothing. He quickly followed her suit and jumped down to view the puzzle ahead of him.

“Please place the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube on the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube Button.” The voice said. A noise came from behind them, and they turned around to see a hole in the wall surrounded by an orange ring. On the other side of the hole the exit door was in clear view. Within a few seconds, the portal exit shifted to another location, and on the other side a cube lay on the ground. Quickly, Clara ran over and picked up and carried back out to where the Doctor was standing. He was clearly very impressed with the portal and started muttering to himself all sorts of questions about the science behind it. Clara just rolled her eyes. She counted to 5, then ran in through the portal towards the new destination, where the button lay, placed the cube on the button then ran back on out.

“Good. Note the Aperture Science Incandescent Emancipation Grill at the exit. This emancipation grill vaporises any unauthorised material that passes through it. For example, the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube. That being said, please move quickly through the chamber lock as prolonged exposure to the emancipation grill may cause blood to accumulate in your mouth. This is because the emancipation grill can vaporise tooth enamel and even teeth.”

“How charming.” Clara said. She smacked the Doctor's arm to get him out of his trance. “Come on!” She said, pulling his arm through the portal.

“Ooh! Blue! I like that!” The Doctor marveled at the other portal as Clara dragged him to the lift. He followed Clara into the lift and started pacing around it, deep in thought. “Now why did the TARDIS bring us here? What went wrong? She almost didn't seem to want to come here.”

“What planet are we on, Doctor?”

The Doctor licked his finger and hung it in the air. “Hmm.” He mumbled, confused. “The air seems stale. Fixed. Artificial. It's as if this AI takes carbon dioxide out of the air and converts back into oxygen before pumping it back in. Reusing and recycling. Not exactly cost-efficient, she's better off planting a few trees.”

“So what does that mean?”

“She's trying to simulate earth. To make us feel... I don't know... safer, perhaps.”

“So is it earth?”

“I honestly don't know. It seems convenient that 'she' has an American accent.” The Doctor shook his head. “Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Either way, one thing is for sure: We're deep, deep underground.”

“Really?”

“Of course. Think about it.” The Doctor pointed upwards. “The lifts are continually going up. The artificial air. We're not in space, cause we wouldn't have the lifts. And we're not above ground, because of the air. We have to be underground.”

The doors opened, and the pair stepped out.

“You two are doing quite well. Please pick up the portal device in the centre of the room. This will give you control of the blue portal, while the position of the orange portal will remain under my control.” The robot said.

Clara and the Doctor stepped through the blue portal and jumped down towards the stand where the device was supposed to be, only to discover it wasn't there.

“What?” Clara asked, confused. “Where is it? Is this part of the test?” She asked out loud, looking up at the ceiling. The disembodied voice didn't respond.

“Clara. Over here.” The Doctor walked over to an arrow drawn on the wall. A panel was extending out slightly, just wide enough for the Doctor and Clara to squeeze through.

“Oh my God...” Clara breathed as she examined the sight. The area was dank and mangy, as if it had not been properly looked after. Broken stairwells and catwalks lined the tall but narrow area. On the wall marked drawings and messages scribbled in the same black charcoal used to make the arrow. A drawing of a camera, with a message that read: 'She always watches.' The word 'Help' is scribbled on messily. Posters and calendars from old offices, torn and mouldy with age.

“Pin-up girl calendars?” Clara made a face.

“This is Gregorian, so we're definitely on earth.” The Doctor nodded. “So that's good news at least.”

“Pin-up girls?” Clara said again. “We're definitely in America then. When do you reckon... the 50's? 60's?”

“These calendars look very old. I'd say at least 40 or 50 years.” The Doctor answered. “If I had a guess, I'd say 2007.”

“Look! There's a drawing of a rat here...”

Suddenly, a blue portal opened up underneath them, sending them falling. They fell from the ceiling and landed with an “Oof!” on a small catwalk in another den outside the testchambers. A woman, just shorter than Clara and wearing an orange jumpsuit identical to theirs approached them. In both hands she carried a portal gun aimed at the pair's feet. She looked menacingly at them but said nothing.  
The pair were stunned and stood stock still. For the longest time nobody spoke, until the strange woman jabbed Clara and the Doctor with the gun, trying to get them to speak. Clara spluttered, before speaking.

“I'm... uh.... Clara and... uhh... this is um... the Doctor.” Clara jabbed the Doctor with her elbow when he didn't do anything, and he nodded and waved awkwardly.

“Hi.” He mumbled.

The strange woman's expression did not change. She was clearly sceptical of the pair. Clara seemed to notice her scepticism and tried to reassure her.

“We're, um, human!” She nodded with false enthusiasm. “Both of us, yeah! We both woke up in the pods and had to try and solve these testchambers.”

The woman stared at them a moment longer, and satisfied, she put down the portal gun. She picked up a drum of water sitting on a box and drank from it. She offered it to Clara, who took it graciously.

“So,” said Clara, sitting down next to her. “Do you have a name?”

The woman's lips trembled as she troubled to speak. “Ch-Chell.” She stammered.

“Chell, eh? That's a nice name.” She smiled at her. “How long have you been here?”

Chell just shrugged. She pointed to the narrow gap in the wall which lead to the next testchamber.

“You're right. We've got a lot of tests to get through.” Clara nodded. “But don't you worry, Chell,” Clara reassured her, putting a hand on her shoulder. “The Doctor here is very clever and with his help we will surely find a way out of 'ere.”

Chell smiled, and disappeared out of the den.


	3. Chell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mysterious Chell appears, and with it comes more difficult testchambers and a portal gun at their side. But what is this mysterious voice secretely planning? Why are the tests getting more violent?

“I see you two have made a friend.” The voice said to Clara and the Doctor. “Don't let that get to your heads though. As far as anyone as concerned, at this stage, you have no other friends. Only testing.”

“How morbid.” The Doctor mumbled. 

“Before we move on, I am obligated to warn you that this next test has established obstacles that may hinder your ability to complete this testchambers.” The group walked around the corner as the voice spoke.

“For example, we have created a toxic moat that, if entered, will leave an unsatisfactory mark on your report, followed by death. Good luck!”

“Oh great. So now the tests can kill us. Joy.” Clara scoffed sarcastically. “What do we do, Doctor?”

“It's not me you should be asking.” The Doctor said, pointing to Chell.

Chell was effortlessly solving the test chamber, using portals to guide the large vaporising orb to its conductor to activate the moving platform to guide them towards the exit. She turned and smiled at Clara.

“Thanks, I guess.” Clara blinked, then smiled at Chell, who just winked back.

The group stepped on the platform, which glided across a futuristic laser-type rail towards the exit. A little radio sat on the platform, playing the same tune that Clara had heard in the incubation chamber after she woke. Chell stared angrily at it before kicking it into the moat. Clara stared at her in shock, the Doctor with interest, as if he were studying the behaviour of a monkey. Chell shook herself, then turned to smile at Clara to reassure her. 

“It's annoying and it gets stuck in my head.” She said simply.

“Right... Of course.” Clara said, as if she didn't believe her. 

“We have bigger things to worry about, you two.” The Doctor interrupted, stepping off the platform and leading them to the elevator. “For instance, the fact that if we slip and fall, we die. So we have to be steady on our feet. Quite literally. Come on now!” 

The women followed the Doctor into the elevator and ascended to the next testchamber. They stepped out and approached a wall. 

“How do we get up?” Clara asked, looking all the way up the immense blockade. 

“Turn around.” Chell said, gently grabbing Clara's hand and guiding it towards the vertical platform sticking out from the wall. 

“This next test tests your ability on the knowledge of momentum. When moving through portals, the momentum in a system is conserved.” The voice chimed in, confirming Chell's idea. 

“In Layman's terms,” The Doctor and the voice explained as one, “Speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out.”

“Great minds think alike.” Clara winked at the Doctor, but Chell just stared at him angrily, distrusting. 

“And dangerous minds.” Chell said, grabbing Clara's hand and shooting the blue portal on the floor in front of her. She shot the orange portal on the platform above her, and leaped with Clara through the portal and over the wall onto another platform. The Doctor shrugged and followed suit. 

“Sometimes, you may need to double fling yourself.” The voice explained. “Where you jump into the portal on the floor, then fall into it again to allow yourself more momentum to get to the other side.”   
Chell nodded and jumped into the newly-created blue portal on the floor below her, no longer holding onto Clara. She flew out the orange portal that she projected onto the wall near the ceiling behind her, fell into the blue portal again and flung herself across the large moat to the other side, where the exit lay. 

“Okay, this seems easy enough.” Clara breathed hard. She was scared. The Doctor stopped her.

“Hold on, Chell?” The Doctor called across the toxic no-man's land. “Why don't you just shoot a portal on the wall next to you? That way we can get across.”

“No can do, Doc.” Chell shrugged. She demonstrated by shooting a portal onto the black wall next to her. The portal just fizzled into thin air, remaining on the floor in front of Clara.

“Interesting. It only works on white surfaces.” The Doctor puzzled for a moment, in deep thought, before he was interrupted by Clara's hyperventilating. “Clara are you alright?!”

“Doctor! I can't do it! What if I miss the jump? What if I don't make it? ANSWER ME DOCTOR!” 

“Clara Oswin Oswald. The bravest girl I've ever known. The 'Impossible Girl'. If anyone can do this, you can. Take my hand. We just close our eyes, and jump!” The Doctor grabbed Clara's hand and leapt through the portal. “GERINOMO!” He yelled, laughing as he flew across the gap. Clara kept her eyes shut. They managed to stick the landing next to Chell, who quickly pulled Clara towards the elevator.

“Come on!” She whispered harshly. “Not long to go now!”

“Well done.” The voice said as they got to the elevator. “You are all doing quite well.”

“Wait, Doctor...” Clara whispered. “I never actually thought about it. How are we going to get out of here? What happens after we finish the last testchamber.”

“I'm... thinking of something.” The Doctor mumbled. Chell glared at him.

“Well you better start doing Doctor!” Chell growled, putting emphasis on the last syllable. “We haven't got much time left, and I don't think this disembodied freak is planning on keeping us alive. If you're so clever, do something!” 

The Doctor just gulped and said nothing. The elevator doors opened. 

“You are approaching the end of the test. As part of a required test protocol, at the end of this test, there will be cake!” The voice turned all glitchy and staticy.   
“Cake... Oh no... Doctor?” Clara turned to the Doctor, wide-eyed.

“The cake is a lie...” The Doctor stared back at her. 

Chell nodded. “Like I said. We need to get out of here as soon as possible!”

“There must be a way out somehow after the last testchamber. We're onto the penultimate one. We're almost there.” The Doctor sauntered on around the corner, before quickly jumping back around the other side.

“What's wrong, Doctor?”

“Due to an unfortunate and irreversible error, the next test has been replaced by one used to train military androids.” The voice spoke, somehow lacking more emotion than usual. “We apologise for this small incovenience, and we will get back to the normal testchambers soon after.”

“Doctor, what's wrong!?” Clara asked again.

The Doctor gulped and took a deep breath. “Sentry Turrets.”

A small, robotic voice called from around the corner. “Hello...? Is anyone there...?”


	4. Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Human lives are overrated. Let's up the ante.

  
“Sentry Turrets!?” Clara cried. “You mean the ones which shoot lots of bullets at whoever walks past them!?”

“The very same.” The Doctor panted, sweating like mad.

“How do we get past them?” Clara grabbed the Doctor's arm, desperate for answers.

“We do what this voice has been telling us to do since the beginning.” Chell smirked, prepping the portal gun. “We think with portals.” She shot a portal at the ceiling above her before stepping out to face the turret.

“There you are.” The turret deadpanned, firing at her. Chell quickly shot a portal underneath where the turret sat. Clara cried out as the turret came falling from the ceiling in front of her. The turret cried out in simulated anguish as it flailed and fired randomly on the ground. “Shutting down.” It said sadly as the guns retracted into their bodies. Clara nervously stepped over the turret and followed Chell.

“Now I must ask you Chell.” The Doctor said. “Who's putting all these X's around the place?”

“I don't know. But whoever they are, I have to thank them.”

“Probably the same guy who did all that creepy writing and the weird rat drawings.” Clara said nonchalantly. Chell turned wide-eyed and grabbed Clara by her collar.

“What rat-drawings!?” She yelled suddenly. “Where!?”

“I don't know! The ones we found before we met you!” Clara cried, pushing Chell off her. “Wasn't exactly the most gracious of encounters I might add.” She scowled at her.

“What's so important about the rat-drawings, Chell?” The Doctor asked her. “How long have you been here?”

Chell gulped and tried to fight back tears. “Since I was a child. I can barely remember. All I remember was 'Bring Your Daughter To Work Day.' My dad was a neuroscientist here at Aperture. He studied the behaviour of...” She trailed off.

“Rats.” The Doctor finished. Chell nodded and sank into Clara's shoulder. She started to cry.

“What happened, Chell?” The Doctor asked, although he was pretty sure he already knew the answer.

“I don't know. All I remember was the alarms going off, and people flopping on the floor all around me, choking.” Chell choked back tears. “My dad grabbed me and dragged me out of the seminar hall. He brought me to these incubation pods and put me in one. He tried to get in one too, but a turret had shot him while he was carrying me, and he didn't make it. I assumed he died. I don't know where he is now.”

“When was this?” Clara asked, wiping Chell's face with her hand.

“I don't know.” Chell shrugged and shook her head. “Not long after Cave Johnson, the former CEO and founder of Aperture died I think.”

“Was Cave a woman by any chance?” The Doctor asked.

“No he wasn't.” Chell replied. “And I know what you're suggesting. He planned to start working on Artifical Intelligence when my dad first got his job here. But he died before the project could start.”

“How did he die?”

“Poisoned. Crushed up moon rocks.” Chell laughed. “Pretty funny, but it's true.”

“A neurotoxin.” The Doctor nodded. “Crushed up rocks from your moon, when reacted with water, creates a neurotoxin so deadly that a very dilute amount can kill within days. A concentrated gaseous form of the neurotoxin kills within minutes.”

“That's what she used to kill the scientists.” Chell's face went white. “Oh god... My dad...” She started crying again.

“Hey, it'll be okay.” Clara stroked Chell's bare arm. “We know that your dad survived the attack, right? He made all those drawings to warn us. He painted the X's to show you where to put your portals.” She smiled. “He might still be out there.”

Chell shook her head. “No way. He'll be long gone by now. He only provided enough resources so I could survive if I ever got out of the incubation chambers.”

“At least he's helped us. So his death is not in vain.” The Doctor said. “I'm sorry to ruin this little moment between you two, but we really should get moving. Chell, I have my full trust and confidence in you.”

Chell nodded and smiled, wiping the tears from her cheeks. She sniffed. “Okay. I got this.” She moved swiftly, manipulating the portals and cubes to incapacitate the turrets. The turrets distressed cries grew more worrisome as the testchamber went on.

“I don't hate you...”

“Why...”

“Goodnight...”

“These turrets are super creepy...” Clara shuddered, hiding behind the wall so she couldn't see them.

“They're not deliberately being creepy.” The Doctor said. “That pain, those emotions, they're very real. For them at least. It's been programmed into the system. Simulated.”

“But why? What's the point?” Chell asked.

“As a form of punishment.” The Doctor scowled. “Seems this lady rules Aperture with an iron fist.”

“It's like a reverse cyberman...” Clara shuddered.

“Oh no, trust me. Let's hope you never encounter one of those on your journey with me.” The Doctor himself shuddered.

“I never asked – how did you get here?” Chell asked, placing a cube on the button and swiftly removing the turret placed on the other side of the opening door. “You seem to just appear out of nowhere.”

“We're not actually sure ourselves.” Clara explained. “We were just-” She hesitated. “Travelling, before suddenly we blacked out, and we woke up here.”

“How long, do you think?” Chell's eyes narrowed.

“Not long.” The Doctor said cheerfully. “Clara still looks the same age.”

“Incubation pods. They make you live forever.” Chell said. “It could be any year at all and none of us would know it.”

“How does 2007 sound for you?” The Doctor smirked. Chell looked shocked. “Bit of a while for you, is it?” The Doctor's expression changed to concern.

“I was 10 when I was put into that incubation pod...” Chell's eyes widened. “In 1989.”

Clara's eyes also widened. “You honestly don't look a day over 20.”

“That's the thing- I don't know if I am.” Chell went white. “I've been in incubation for 8 years!? And alone for 10 more!?”

“We-We don't know that for sure, Chell.” Clara reassured her. “It could be earlier, you don't know.”

“Or it could be much, much later.” The Doctor said. “This is only going of a calendar I saw in one of Ratman's dens.”

“Ratman? You're calling my dad Ratman?”

“Well what else do you want me to call him?”

“I- I don't remember. Ratman's good.”

“Also Doctor, that isn't very reassuring.” Clara scolded.

“Neither is the knowledge that this disembodied robot voice here is trying to kill us. We should get moving.”

*

“Well done. You have made it to the last chamber.” The ominous voice called. “This is the hardest of them all, and afterwards there will be cake. As part of a required test protocol, we can no longer lie to you. When the test is over, you will be missed.”

“Yeah cause we'll be dead.” Chell mumbled.

“Y-you have a plan right?” Clara asked, unsure.

“Well I... uh.. well... no. To be honest.” The Doctor shrugged. I'm sure I'll think of something.

“Done it. Now we just have to step on the platform, and not fall off.” Chell said, after moving the vaporiser to the conductor to activate it.

“Alright. Here goes.” The Doctor said.

As the platform moved through the narrow corridor, bending around corners and through obstacles (which Chell solved effortlessly), the Doctor was deep in thought, pacing as much as he could around the tiny platform.

“So... Chell...” Clara started.

“Yeah?” Chell replied, smiling.

“I was wondering... After we get out of here, would you like to... um... join us? On our adventures? We travel all through ti- I mean, we can travel all through space in our little spaceship!” Clara didn't want to reveal the TARDIS' time travelling capabilities, in case Chell insisted on changing the past to prevent the genocide of the scientists.

“As much as I would love to spend more time with you,” Chell said, bringing her face right up to Clara's. “I have to clean up this mess. Go to the police. Tell them what happened. Find my mother, etcetera.”

“We can help you.”

“Thanks. I really appreciate all that you have done for me.” Chell smiled and hugged Clara. “You are an amazing woman and I hope you find someone who loves you as much as I do.”

“You are absolutely amazing and sweet.” Clara smiled. “I hope we meet in another time.”

“Burning. I smell burning.” The Doctor jumped up suddenly.

As if on cue, the voice responded. “As part of a required test protocol, we no longer need, or require, your aid in our tests. Thus you will be disposed of.” The platform started to move slowly towards a pit of fire ahead of them. Flames surged. The heat was overwhelming. “All aperture equipment are designed to survive temperatures of over 4000 degrees Kelvin.” The voice continued, still with no emotion. “The human body however, does not. Thank you for participating in the Aperture Science Enrichment Centre for Experimentation.”

“DOCTOR DO SOMETHING!”

“Goodbye.”


	5. The Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long hiatus! I just kinda abandoned this wip. But I've written a lot and I promise you it's almost finished. 
> 
> How will the three escape their fiery doom? What more could this robot have up its sleeve?

Clara screamed. The platform was moving closer and closer to the fire pit. Sweat poured down all their faces. Chell was looking around furiously, desperate to find a way out. She slapped the doctor's arm with the back of her hand and indicated upwards.

 

“Excellent! But how do we get there?” The Doctor asked, gesturing to the vent in the platform across the pit from them.

 

Chell grimaced and shot a portal to her right, only centimetres above the raging inferno.

 

“Ah.” Whispered the Doctor. Chell quickly grabbed Clara, who proceeded to squeal and jump. Chell spoke rapidly and loudly above the noise. “Clara do you trust me?”

 

“Um- um um...” Clara panicked. She grabbed the Doctor's jacket for support, her legs were shaking.

 

“ _Do you trust me?_ ” Chell yelled again.

 

“I- I-” Clara found it difficult to form any coherent words admist the chaos. _WHAP!_

 

“ _ **I SAID, DO YOU TRUST ME?”**_ Chell yelled, slapping Clara across the face, hard but not violently.

 

“YES!” Clara yelled, shaking her head violently. Chell grabbed her and the Doctor and screamed.

 

“THEN JUMP!”

 

_fwoosh._

 

“What are you d-d-d-doing?” A scarily familiar voice crackled through the loudspeaker. “I, I iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-”

 

_SKKRRSHHH_

 

“W-w-w-we are pleased, that you made it through the final challenge.” There was a pause, and while the voice still lacked emotion, it clearly wasn't happy. “That we pretended that we were going to murder you.” A few more seconds of silence. The fire had since died down, but the heat and sound of the flames was still overpowering. Clara and Chell's hair stuck up in different places, and sweat mixed with the dirt and blood on their skin.

 

“Yeah? An-” Chell started to say, but was quickly interrupted by feminine robot.

 

“As a celebration, there will be a party thrown in your honour/honours. There will be cake at the party.”

Clara looked at Chell and gulped. Chell simply nodded, but she was clearly scared.

 

“A party associate will arrive shortly, to escort you to the party. However, you must assume the party escort position. Place the portal device on the ground, and lie on your stomach with your hands by your sides.”

 

“Well that will definitely get us killed. We need a plan.” The Doctor said, after the robot cut herself off.

 

“Yeah no shit Sherlock.” Chell rolled her eyes at the Doctor.

 

“I think you're thinking of the wrong show-” The Doctor couldn't finish, as suddenly he was falling through the air. He fell flat on his feet with a slight _thud._

 

“Found your plan, wizard.” Chell ducked under a massive stationary turbine, along the marked path.

 

“Right. Yes. Well done.” That Doctor babbled, adjusting his bow tie. “Also I'm a time lor-”

 

“Fine. Time wizard. Whatever.” Chell replied without looking at him. The Doctor only mumbled something inaudible under his breath. “Through here.” Chell gestured with the portal gun to continue down the catwalk, Clara close behind her. The rusted metal squeaked as they walked, and occasionally bits of railing would fall to the sickly brown-green goo below. The trio searched and searched for a way out, constantly following Chell as they manuevered their way through labs, observatory chambers, catwalk after catwalk. Through vents and down elevator shafts. As they proceeded along, a faded metalic voice crackled and echoed down through the vast facility.

 

“Hello...? I know you can hear me...” The robot voice whispered. “I can see you... I know where you are...” A long pause. “... Hello...?”

 

“Oh boy this robot AI thing is really pissed at us, isn't she? She's going to kill us.” Clara tried to say calmly, but instead coming out like a frightened chihuahua.

 

“Whatever _it_ is...” The Doctor responded, “It's not going to kill us. Not if we stay together, and alert. We could drop right back into a testchamber any moment.”

 

“Not if my dad helps us.” She pointed to an arrow around the corner, gesturing up. Rounding the corner, the three looked up to see a mass of moving compressors, oscillating back and forth, occassionally crushing the walls. “Here's a clear spot here.” In the space of only a few seconds, Chell fired a portal on a wall halfway up the drop, and a portal underneath the three of them. They landed on top of a compressor moving towards the centre to meet another compressor with a loud _BANG._

 

“I appreciate everything you're doing honey but please warn me next time before you do that.” Clare begged Chell. Chell just shrugged and smiled cheekily. “Up there! There's a spot! And it leads to the way out.” Clara pointed excitedely to a white panel on the ceiling of the top floor, behind a metal wire fence. Below it was solid ground. Chell obliged and portaled the trio onto the concrete. They followed the concrete until it turned back into a metal catwalk. About twenty metres up, they approached a near dead end, with the only exit being a pit in the ground which leaded to a lower level.

 

“It's a trap.” Clara said.

 

“It mostly definitely is a trap, my dear Clara.” The Doctor affirmed.

 

“But what choice do we have?” Chell swallowed. “We can't go back.” She jumped in.

 

“Into the belly of the beast.” The Doctor said, and jumped in after her, with Clara in tow.

 

They landed in a room with three large doors. Scattered around were some barrells and some water tanks.

 

“Doctor...” Clara looked around and sniffed the air. “Do you smell smoke?”

 


	6. Cornered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is anyone there...?

A loud alarm blared through the tiny room, causing the three to all cover their ears. On their left, smoke started pouring out of a door and the door slowly opened.

“Hello...?” The horrifying high-pitched voice seem to reverberate through the space. The laser pointer was the first thing spotted. Pointing straight at Clara. The sentry turret locked on to her and whispered monotously. “Deploying.” But before the bullets could penetrate and sever Clara's body, the turret flew out the door through an orange hole with a high-pitched wail. “Please!...” No sooner than the turret had stopped firing in its frenzy than the middle door started opening. The trio rushed for cover, and Chell prepared the gun. Like the first turret, the second turret flew out the door with a sad and frightened plea, as did the third in the right door.

“There seems to be a way to shout out through that hole there Chell.” The Doctor pointed through a small hole inside the turret's spawn door. Chell nodded and fired a portal through the hole.

“It seems as if our escape is like a final examination.” The Doctor mumbled, rubbing his chin.

“You're mumbling, Doctor.” Clara said vehemently. “You know I hate it when you mumble. It's usually when you realise something horrible.”

“Horrible maybe, but it is clever.” The Doctor said, beginning to pace in the tiny space filled with broken turrets they were in now. “Think about it: We've had to fling and double fling ourselves to get to other places, we've had to dodge massive things coming to crush us, we've had turrets? What's next, Clara?” He walked up to her and stared her right through the eye. “What is that AI's plan?”

“It doesn't matter right now. What matters is getting out of this hellhole.” Chell shouted from behind a hole she crawled through. “Now come through and help me move this door.”

“You Americans are always so impatient.” The Doctor grumbled, but obliged and helped heave the door open and kick the resting turret out. “There's another lab up ahead. Let's have a quick search to see if we can find a map or anything.”

“This is serious now.” The voice came on suddenly just as they entered the lab, making Clara jump. “Turn back or I will kill you.” It seemed more distant now, and it was becoming more desperate. “I'm going to kill you, and all the cake is gone. You don't even care, do you?”

“Yeah but I care about getting through this fucking window!” Chell growled, banging on the pane of glass they were stuck behind. They couldn't seem to find any other way out that didn't lead back to where they came, and Ratman's signs pointed towards it.

“What is that thing in the middle, Doctor?” Clara asked, pointing towards the centre of the testing room where a circular object lay in the middle of the floor.

“I'm not sure. Maybe this button might help.” The Doctor said. “Sometimes you just have to-” The Doctor smacked the red button in front of him. “Smack red buttons. Despite all the warning signs.”

BEEP BWOOP

“I think that's probably a good enough warning sign don't you think?” Clara said, staring at the flashing red light on the ceiling.

“Or maybe that thing is.” Chell shrieked, backing away. The other two turned to find-

BANG!

A missile smashed against the window screen, sending a shockwave so fierce they all smacked against the back wall and against the door.

“Ow. Well that at least solves our window problem.” The Doctor groaned and sat up quickly.

“I think it's tracking me, Doc. I have an idea.” Chell ran towards the other window on the other side of the small testing area. Sure enough, the small robot tracked her, albeit slowly, towards the window where she stood. At the last second, she dove out of the way before the missile hit her, causing the missile to shatter the window behind her.

“Perfect, Chell!” The Doctor cried as he grabbed Clara and ran out the other side.

“Now what?” Clara said as she ran through the lab exit door. “Hold on there's a cube over here...” She picked up the box, and looking at the arrows, searched her way towards- “A vent! Everyone, climb up on this box and into the vent.”

“The vent leads straight into the sewage system. From there we can find some sort of pipe out into the ocean.” Explained the Doctor.

“Good. Well not for my shoes and my nose but you know.” Clara replied. Chell giggled.

“I've had more than my fair share of that, hun.” She drawled. “Let's get moving.” After a short while, they came to a dead end. A small opening in the form of a grate enabled Chell to shoot at a wall above, letting them through.

“Hmm. Sudden vast space, I don't like this at all.” Clara frowned. “Not to mention the doors. Where do we go?”

They approached an area the size of two olympic dive pools, in depth and width.

“Clara...” The Doctor froze. “Don't those doors look familiar to you?”

As if on cue, an alarm beeped, and the doors opened all at once.

Revealing an army of robotic sentry turrets.


	7. The Part Where She Kills You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An epic showdown. The three must use the skills they have learned to defeat the evil AI. If they fail, they all die. If they succeed, the facility gets destroyed. 
> 
> What will become of Chell in the end?

“Quick! Get to cover!” The Doctor screamed as he threw Clara into a corner.

“I got this!” Chell cried when the Doctor reached for her. Within seconds, Chell selected her first target. She fired a portal next to her and the other next to the turret, quickly grabbing the turret and throwing it on the ground next to her.

“Noo.....” The turret let out a sad, high-pitched wail before shutting down.

“Quick! Get in here. It'll be harder for the turrets to hit you.” Chell motioned the other two to crawl into the box the turret had once resided. A turret on the other side of the vast space aimed and readied to fire. Before the turret could shoot, Chell had already disposed of it, but not without scaring Clara as it came flying towards her, firing randomly at the ceiling before shutting down.

"I don't blame you..." The turret moaned. A shudder went down Clara's spine as her fear turned to guilt.

Only minutes later, the convoy had been cleared of turrets and Chell stood triumphant with Portal gun in hand. She smirked, and jumped out of the door, landing on the ground 3 metres below on her special boots. With a double fling sending the trio flying several metres through the air, they landed on some carpet that lead to another observatory room, this one bigger than any of the others.

"Look through that window there." The Doctor tapped Clara on the shoulder and pointed out the large window. A vast empty space lay outside, with a long corridor extending out towards a massive dome. Clara shivered.

"That's where she is." Clara whispered shakily. The Doctor just nodded and squeezed her arm reassuringly.

They walked down the long corridor. Their footsteps echoed as they walked. Lights on the ground twinkled like airplane emergency lights. In the distance, TV screens flashed with hundreds of images per minute, pausing every so often on random images. Below that, a robotic husk hung from it, multitudes of tubes and wires extending from the corpse-like structure. The position and shape of the wires and tubes made her look like a fly wrapped up for a spider to eat. A being of such horrific malice. Without even looking at them as they approached, she spoke.

"So you found me."

Chell and Clara gulped. The Doctor just stared with an odd expression on his face. A mixture of awe and horror. A large disk circled above the robotic beast, presumably housing the origin of the wires and tubes extended from it. Around it bore an acronym and the several words it stood for.

'Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System', or 'GLaDOS', for short.

"GLaDOS." The Doctor whispered with a small laugh.

"Congratulations. Was it worth it?" GLaDOS voice boomed throughout the antechamber. Her one 'eye' still fixated on a spot on the carpeted floor. "Because despite your VIOL-ent behaviour..."

Chell and Clara rolled their eyes as the screens portrayed the image of a broken violin, before continuing on it's random rapid slideshow.

"...The only thing you've managed to break so far," the AI continued, "was my heart."

Chell pretended to strangle herself.

"Maybe you could settle for that, and we'll just call it a day. I guess we both know that isn't going to happen." GLaDOS was beginning to sound angry. This worried the Doctor. "You all chose this path, and now I have a surprise for you." Her voice deepened. "Deploying surprise in 5, 4-"

'CLONK!'

A small, white metal ball disconnected off the robot's 'body' and flopped onto the ground beneath her. Apart from two purple handles and a veiny purple 'eye', it bore no significant details. Chell picked it up and examined it closely, curious.

"Time out for a second," GLaDOS interrupted herself. "That wasn't supposed to happen. Do you see the thing that fell out of me? It wasn't the surprise. I've never seen it before." Her speech appeared rushed, as if she was frightened. "Never mind. It's a mystery I'll solve later, because you'll be dead."

"There's another one of those incinerator things we saw earlier! at the back!" Clara pointed out to Chell, who smirked and immediately began to walk across to it, carrying the metal ball with the portal gun's special grip. Clara noted the blue light trail, and followed to a button up a flight of stairs.

"No don't-" The Doctor screamed, but it was too late. Clara pressed the button, and Chell dropped the ball into the now open incinerator.

"Where are you taking that th-" GLaDOS started. The ball exploded with a loud 'BANG!' GLaDOS' body shook violently. Her voice started to glitch out. "whirrrrrrrrr YOu're kidding me. Did you just stick that Aperture Science thing-we-don't-know-what-it-does into an Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator? That has got to be the dumbest thing I-" She stopped suddenly. She started shaking again, this time with much more vigour. "Woah woah woooooooaaaaaaaaaaaah." She stopped shaking. She stayed silent for a defeaning amount of time.

"Have we done it?" Clara asked, rejoining Chell and the Doctor.

"Ha ha ha..." GLaDOS chuckled slightly.

They all gulped.

"Good news." A different voice said. It originated from GLaDOS general direction, but this sounded far different from the one from before. More sinister. More... human. "I figured out what that thing you just incinerated did." She laughed again. "It was a morality core I installed after I flooded the Enrichment Centre with a deadly neurotoxin, to make me stop flooding the Enrichment Centre with a deadly neurotoxin."

"Oh no." Chell whispered.

"What have we done!?" Clara cried.

"So get comfortable while I warm up the emitters." The human-sounding AI continued.

A countdown clock appeared on the screens, showing 6 minutes until the neurotoxin would be potent enough to kill them. The three all around like headless chooks, trying to figure out what to do.

"Hoh!" GLaDOS gasped. "I guess that morality core did have some responsibilities. I can't shut off the turret defenses." One of the small missile launchers they encountered earlier rose up from a hole in the ground, immediately aiming at Chell, before firing.

"Jesus!" Chell dove out of the way, the missile exploding on the wall behind her, leaving nothing but black scorch marks.

"Oh well. If you want my advice, you should just lay down in front of a rocket." GLaDOS mocked.

"It targets whoever has the Portal gun!" Chell realised. She looked up at GLaDOS, and noticed three other metal balls like the one she had incinerated earlier attached to the robot. "I have an idea!" She cried. "Clara, you run back over to the button and stay there!"

"Righto!" Clara obeyed, running off towards the button.

"Doctor!" Chell called out. "Go to the incinerator and stay there. I'm going to use the portal gun to direct the missiels straight into her. Hopefull it'll knock those things off her, so I can pass them on to you. Clara, keep watch and make sure to smack the button as soon as I give the Doctor those core thingies. Got it?"

The Doctor smiled. "Sounds like a plan!" The Doctor ran off towards the incinerator. "GERONIMO!" He shrieked with glee.

"Right." Chell wiped fresh blood off her face. "Come at me you bitch."

The missile locked onto her. It fired, and Chell immediately dove out of the way, firing a portal where the missile was headed and one a few metres above it. The missile travelled through the portal and-

'BANG!' The missile connected with GLaDOS body, and she convulsed again as her speech went haywire. A white ball with an orange eye flew off her body and landed on top of a pipe a few metres in the air. Chell grimaced, and teleported towards the core before teleporting to the Doctor to give it to him. Clara smacked the button, and the Doctor threw the core into the fire.

'POW!'

GLaDOS screamed an inhumane scream, before continuing to glitch and spasm out. She regained her senses, and continued her spiel about killing the trio.

"Again!" The Doctor cried. Chell leapt into action, using the portal to divert the rocket back into GLaDOS. GLaDOS shriked again, and a blue core landed on top of the disk above her body. Chell scowled, and teleported up to it, before throwing it down towards the Doctor, who promptly incinerated it.

"That's it! Now one more!" The Doctor laughed. He looked at the countdown clock, and his face dropped when he realised he only had a minute left to live.

"You fools!" GLaDOS laughed. "You should stop trying. This neurotoxin isn't deadly, I said that in massive sarcasm. I can bathe in this stuff. Rub it right into my eyes." She made a noise as if she were inhaling then exhaled. "HAHAHA!" She had clearly gone insane. An insane, self-aware, killing machine. Chell had finally managed to apprehend the last core. It was red, and snarled and growled at her, thrashing violently in her arms. Disgusted, she held it at arms length and threw it into the open incinerator. The countdown stopped, and GLaDOS body whirred and sparked. Bits of her body dropped from the ceiling and fell to the floor with an almighty 'CRASH!'. The entire complex went white, and Chell, Clara and the Doctor found themselves losing sense of gravity and floating up towards the blinding white light.

FWOOSH!

Fire flared on the surface as bits of debris flew everywhere. The Doctor dragged an unconscious Clara into the TARDIS. He ran back out to get Chell, who was awake, but her leg had been crushed by a flaming metal hoop. He started heaving at her arms to pull her out.

"No." Chell said, pushing him away. "I'll be fine. Let the authorities find me. Someone must have heard/seen that in this broad daylight. You go."

"I can't just leave you here." The Doctor shook his head.

"Don't worry about me, you moron." She laughed. "Just- take care of her, ok?"

The Doctor looked sadly back at the TARDIS. He turned back to Chell and with a tear down his eye, nodded. "I will."

"Thank you." She smiled weakly, then passed out on the ground, the portal gun lying next to her.

The Doctor walked slowly back to the TARDIS and opened the door. He stopped. He turned to look back at Chell, who lay still there amongst the debris. He stepped inside, and closed the doors. The TARDIS departed with it's warp-like noise. From behind Chell, a small robot started clearing debris, and dragged Chell by her legs. It spoke the one thing it knew how.

"Thank you for assuming the party escort position." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mD3v1B_aXw0


End file.
